Just one of the venues in this small chain of fully-nude lapdancing clubs in London, Secrets Euston (or Secrets 5 as it’s otherwise known) is unexpectedly classy and a great night out, whether you’re male or female.
Upon entering Secrets Euston, you’re met with a darkened, air-conditioned room, adorned with deep red cushioned booths, mirrored walls and thick folds of organza festooning the ceiling – the perfect decor to evoke the boudoir. A small stage and single pole is central to the main area of the club, with the bar situated out of the way. Through a velvet curtain there is also the usual VIP champagne lounge, which requires the purchase of a bottle of vintage champagne to enter, which will set you back around £350.
Downstairs is the club’s pride and joy, and a feature exclusive to Secrets Euston. Named the Salon Prive, it is a room whose decor is blue as opposed to the reds upstairs. It comprises 10 booths that seat 2-10 people each, and each has its own curtains and pole, which you can even have a twirl around yourself. Of course, this does not come cheap – the minimum requirement is that you purchase a bottle of vintage champagne that’s around double what you pay for the VIP champagne lounge.
If you had any preconceptions about strip joints, then they should be removed upon entering. The dancers on the pole never remove their clothes, and most take their clients into the secluded booths for the private nude dances. Many are professional dancers, and it is entertaining to watch them perform onstage.
The clientele is unexpected – there are the usual rich businessmen and stag parties, but there are also couples and mixed groups of friends. Women will often find the atmosphere safer and they get much less hassle from men than they would in normal clubs.
The DJ plays a generic mix of chart and older classic pop and RnB for the girl on the pole to dance to, but then people don’t come to this sort of club for the music.
Table service is provided by all-male waiters, and the drinks are expensive. This is mainly because customers don’t really come here for the drinks, so the range is limited, apart from the fine wines and champagnes, of course. Prices are also at the expensive end of the scale, so don't come expecting to drink plenty without draining your wallet.
The Last Word
Secrets Euston is an unexpected pleasure – not shady or sleazy, it is a great night out for both men and women who want to pay good money to see erotic female dancing, either clothed or unclothed.